• Telorand
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    82
    ·
    11 days ago

    It’s real in that it’s a human experience shared by some. It’s not real in that it’s not gender specific.

    The real meme is the fact that some people continue to perpetuate these outdated gender stereotypes.

      • ProfessorOwl_PhD [any]@hexbear.net
        link
        fedilink
        English
        arrow-up
        20
        ·
        11 days ago

        Do most people fit gender stereotypes, or do we pressure and condition people through cultural hegemony to fit themselves to gender stereotypes? Considering how much genders and their stereotypes change, it’s fairly safe to say it’s the second.

        • gamermanh@lemmy.dbzer0.com
          link
          fedilink
          English
          arrow-up
          3
          ·
          10 days ago

          Considering how much genders and their stereotypes change, it’s fairly safe to say it’s the second.

          Or we change what we consider to fit that gender over time, you know, like how pink was once a boy’s color?

          There’s more than 2 options

  • the post of tom joad@sh.itjust.works
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    54
    ·
    11 days ago

    When i was younger (sure i’d be dead by 40 younger) i had thoughts about dying saving a bus full of kids. I recall my male friends growing up had similar delusions of grandeur. Is this actually a male thing only? Can’t be, right? Ladies? Anyone? Who did you imagine jumpin in front of a bullet for?

    • Flummoxed@lemmy.world
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      57
      ·
      11 days ago

      Yes, women also think these things. I’d jump in front of a bullet for almost anyone. And it’s a larger possibility than most people that I’d have a chance to do so since I’m a teacher in Texas. 😬

    • MudSkipperKisser@lemmy.world
      cake
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      27
      ·
      10 days ago

      Girl here and I have these delusions of grandeur all the time, just silly day dreams of saving the day and rescuing whoever is near by at present moment. I don’t know why, I’d not do well with the attention of it afterwards, maybe something about feeling strong and capable. I hate feeling weak

    • Shou@lemmy.world
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      20
      ·
      10 days ago

      Woman here. Had many fantasies of saving lives. Both in daydreams and nightmares. Sometimes with superpowers, other times with nothing working in my favor.

      I wouldn’t be suprised if it was a feature of tribalism. Imagining scenario’s in an attempt to prepare for them.

      • corsicanguppy@lemmy.ca
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        2
        ·
        10 days ago

        I wouldn’t be suprised if it was a feature of tribalism[:] Imagining [scenarios] in an attempt to prepare for them.

        Tribalism or just humanity: we are almost set apart by our ability to imagine scenarios and “pre-game” our response. If this was a mechanism to cope with fear of new things or wariness around a risky situation, it’d totally make sense.

      • indepndnt@lemmy.world
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        1
        ·
        10 days ago

        Imagining scenario’s in an attempt to prepare for them.

        Successfully! I remember reading about research into how folks survive scenarios, and having thought about it ahead of time was one of the big ones.

    • Snowclone@lemmy.world
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      5
      ·
      edit-2
      10 days ago

      It’s just a power fantasy, it’s so common it’s why Shazam and Superman were made, and why they got so popular. It’s not bad to have power fantasies, it’s imagination, and there’s nothing bad about thinking you’d like to respond with bravery, or save other people if you saw them in harms way. It’s not wrong thinking to go ‘‘you know if someone came in here to hurt people, I think I’d get in the front and tell other people to run for the back exit, maybe I could stop them’’

      The only way it’s a problem is when you can’t recognize that it’s you imagining how you might behave, rather than a real thing you did, or a real power set you have, which would be a delusion, or if it’s a repeating thought that’s disturbing you and you can’t stop having it, then it can be a symptom of OCD, but generally, it’s perfectly fine to imagine you’d be Superman in a real world situation, that’s how you end up with good superhero stories!

      As for the gender aspect, I have no idea if it has anything to do with social conditioning or physiological make up, I imagine plenty of women also have imaginative ideas about how they’d help or save people in a real problem situation, after all there are famous examples of women lifting very heavy objects off of children, and saving people in war times, opportating in resistance movements and revolutions, being decorated soldiers, sacrificing their life to save others, There’s no lack of heroics from women, I’d assume they also imagine these situations from time to time.

    • TexasDrunk@lemmy.world
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      4
      ·
      10 days ago

      I remember being a teen thinking about beating up an armed robber in a convenience store and saving everyone.

  • PunnyName@lemmy.world
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    26
    ·
    11 days ago

    Depending on circumstance, this can be a sign of insecurity. A hero complex (especially when saving figures of unrequited love) is definitely one.

    • ThatWeirdGuy1001@lemmy.world
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      30
      ·
      11 days ago

      I just want to die but can’t kill myself because then people would be upset so if I die saving someone else it’s a win for everybody.

      This is also how most of my guy friends feel about it.

      • _NoName_@lemmy.ml
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        11
        ·
        11 days ago

        Exactly how I thought about it in highschool.

        That bullet is my ticket outta here and I’ll be damned if someone else is gonna take it before me! course, alot’s changed since then. I’ve got people who care about me and a few promises to keep, and overall my life’s alot better since I have my own autonomy now.

      • PunnyName@lemmy.world
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        6
        ·
        11 days ago

        As a guy, same.

        I even told my therapist yesterday that I don’t want to try to kill myself, because I’ll fuck that up, too.

        • PsychedSy@lemmy.dbzer0.com
          link
          fedilink
          arrow-up
          3
          ·
          10 days ago

          I used to tell my psych I was apathetically suicidal. I’m not gonna throw myself in front of a bus, but I’m not sure I’d jump out of the way either.

    • Coskii@lemmy.blahaj.zone
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      9
      ·
      11 days ago

      Drop the honorably and I’m there. Working on a window today and noticed the trim around it has a bullet hole… Well, time to imagine randomly getting shot in the back for the next 3 hours.

    • Flummoxed@lemmy.world
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      10
      ·
      11 days ago

      Yes, at least some do. I know I’m ready to take the bullet instead of my students, and I’d do the same in other situations as well.

      • dudinax@programming.dev
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        2
        ·
        edit-2
        10 days ago

        But thats a practical situation because of your job. Would you fantasize about doing it if you weren’t a teacher?

        Would you enjoy the fantasy?

        • Flummoxed@lemmy.world
          link
          fedilink
          arrow-up
          2
          ·
          10 days ago

          I mean, I didn’t think the meme meant one had to enjoy it. I definitely considered it long before I was a teacher. The sweet release of death would certainly be nice, and I try to live every day like it’s my last. Saving others would be a great bonus, but it would still not be a fun scenario. So, while I definitely think about it, I would not call it fantasizing? But again, I think you are reading fantasy into the meme.

          • dudinax@programming.dev
            link
            fedilink
            arrow-up
            1
            ·
            10 days ago

            For guys it’s definitely a fantasy. We get a particular thrill imagining we might die for a good cause.

            • Flummoxed@lemmy.world
              link
              fedilink
              arrow-up
              3
              ·
              edit-2
              10 days ago

              I definitely do get a thrill when thinking about dying for a good cause instead of some absolutely pointless death. Hell yeah. I just hesitate to call it a fantasy, because of the other parts of what would have to happen to the people around me to make that happen.

              Maybe that’s the difference: women think about how others will feel more so than themselves while men think mostly of the glory or release it will bring them. Reminds me of the difference in suicide methods based on gender. Women attempt it more but choose easy-to-clean-up methods that are not as efficacious. Men seem to rarely think about who is going to have to clean bits of their brain off the ceiling and walls after they shoot themselves in the head. Wonder if this difference also explains why almost every school shooter is male.

              Edit: I am not trying to say this is genetically differently wired between the genders. I think it has more to do with how boys and girls are raised differently.

  • kakes@sh.itjust.works
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    10
    ·
    11 days ago

    But of a tangent, but I really don’t like the idea of being shot by an arrow. Like, my brain can accept a hypothetical scenario where I get shot by a bullet, but not by an arrow, despite the bullet clearly being the worse option.

    I think it’s the idea of the arrow just… staying there. Like, very clearly sticking out from where it is currently fucking up my organs. It also seems like a slower death, which would suck. Plus, what if you fell forward onto the arrow, or turned and hit it on something?

    Anyway, this has been my TED talk.

      • SacralPlexus@lemmy.world
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        3
        ·
        10 days ago

        “Always” is a very definitive statement. But let me tell you that there is a lot more energy transferred into the tissues around the bullet trajectory. Watch YouTube videos of bullets going through ballistic gel to see what I mean. They don’t just punch holes in people they also have a huge cone of severely damaged tissue surrounding the hole. Also they can break into fragments going different directions and if they hit a bone can even bounce around doing more damage. You just aren’t likely to have that as much with an arrow because there is less energy and the shaft will stop it from richocheting in a different trajectory.

        Also the arrow may help slow blood loss while still in place whereas a bullet is not going to do that.

        About the only thing that a bullet has going for it over an arrow is that depending on where it is you might be able to stop the bleeding (via surgery for example) but don’t necessarily need to dig all of the bullet fragments out. I’ve seen quite a few patients who have bullet fragments retained in their body. No way you can leave part of an arrow though.

  • AntiOutsideAktion [he/him]@hexbear.net
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    9
    ·
    11 days ago

    You must not walk around in chuddy neighborhoods much. I’ve seen plaques attached to exterior walls that are almost identical to the navy seals copypasta claiming “This home is defended by a marine” (then a literal wall of text)

    • morphballganon@lemmynsfw.com
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      6
      ·
      10 days ago

      I think it’s more of a “here’s my contingency plan in case I run into this scenario” kind of thing. It’s a way to keep your brain occupied during boring activities like going to work

  • felykiosa@sh.itjust.works
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    3
    ·
    11 days ago

    That has a vibe of" women bad men good" But that s real I often think about that . And I also think a lot about naked women and no that’s not gross that’s beautiful😍