Insufficient information. Need to know the physician’s gang affiliation.
Does the patient look like a bitch?
Unconscious and pathetic on a hospital bed? Yeah, kinda. /s
W-w-what?
ENGLISH! MOTHERF#$KER, DO YOU SPEAK IT!
[Said Mr. Jackson using his inside voice]
C. Since it just wants one and I would think the immediate safety of people involves moving it away and then tending to the patient.
Messing with the weapon, checking whether it’s empty, isn’t necessary and you’d still have to move it anyway
That’s not what Dr Dre would do, fool
Shit. Looks like we forgot about him again.
HE SPECIFICALLY TOLD US NOT TO DO THAT…
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=QFcv5Ma8u8k YouTube video dr dre Eminem and a third dude Vemo video thingee
Edit: I think he was telling us specifically to fuck off now, in the future, after we forgot about him
Here is an alternative Piped link(s):
https://m.piped.video/watch?v=QFcv5Ma8u8k
Piped is a privacy-respecting open-source alternative frontend to YouTube.
I’m open-source; check me out at GitHub.
Forget about Dre. What would Cube do?
Good, you can work in the ER. Healthcare workers are not assumed to know every firearm and how to operate them, even though we are in America.
I had a girlfriend that was always studying 24/7 for her tests and never had time for me. One day she asked me to help her study and her entire exam was stuff like this, I kid you not. I realized she was too dumb for me and dumped her.
Lmaooo what was she studying?
So… If it wanted more than one what would you select?
B and then E just to keep everyone confused.
Boo yea!
This is just like the dumb HR tests that are like "You see a coworker engage in inappropriate behavior. Should you A. Notify your supervisor, B. Punch them in the face, C. Piss on the floor.
At least the correct answer is obvious instead of a test with vaguely-worded trick questions and ambiguous answers. Those are the tests that make me livid.
I know right? Clearly you piss on the floor.
The secret is to choose the most Ned Flanders response.
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I work in a place that’s closed off to the public by Federal Law, where you need to badge in, just a janitor, nothing fancy, they make us watch training videos and stuff. They warn us to pay maximum attention, because we’ll be barred from the site if we fail, losing our jobs in the process.
And the questions are things like
“Which of the following is safe to drink? A) Filtered Water, B) Literal Poison, C) Lava, D, A School Bus”
It’s so blatantly rigged in the favor of the test taker that I suspect they literally wouldn’t even have the test if it wasn’t a legal requirement.
We also keep getting tested for things that don’t even make sense, like recently we were meant to watch a thing on where and when it’s safe to take a smoke break… Despite the fact that tobacco and marijuana are banned form the site and will be confiscated by security if we bring any… So what exactly are they smoking
Oh right, we’re meant to be smoking chocolate, forgot the Troy McClure film.
Seriously though, most of my training is entirely irrelevant as they involve scenarios I’d never be in due to the nature of my job, scenarios I’m literally not allowed to be in, or scenarios that don’t even exist in the first place…
And the questions are always things like
“If your supervisor asks you to do something illegal should you…” and the answers are non-sequitur alongside the real answer, like - A) Report it to the company hotline for illegal activity 555-555-5555 B) Oppress Women & Minorities, C) Run naked into a blizzard, D) Jump off a cliff and into spikes, or E) Pray to Magi-Chan Sonichu in order to hasten the coming of the Dimensional Merge"
The most subtle examples of this are when they ask a question, and one of the answers is suspiciously and overly detailed, while the others are so overly generic that it’s like they wrote the right answer for one, and then just whatever they can think of off the top of their heads.
fun fact but I find the opposite to be true in trivia games, if an answer is too detailed it’s more likely to be false. That’s how I won a trivia game about the life of some guy when I barely recognised his name
These are less for your education as it is for management/HR to absolve responsibility: “We trained them to not do <xyz>, it’s not our fault they did it”
No shit
We have such a test too, but not as extremely dumb. But it’s still in the realm of: how do you wear your high-vis-vest? A: well visible from all sides B: hidden under your jacket to not get it dirty.
See, you and I may think things like this are obvious but there are some idiots out there that need to be told the obvious things otherwise they end up doing the truly stupid things.
I snorted while eating and almost choke thanks to your comment.
Is this multiple choice or just a suggested series of steps?
Now I want to see a show where an unsuspecting anxiety ridden Nurse accidentally takes out a mob boss and has to run the gang while juggling their work, love and social life.
Unironically an unexplored Nic Cage movie genre.
You kind of just described the subplot of The Brothers Sun.
A. Looks into the barrel with a flashlight
How about treat the patient 😶
That’s step F, after performing the other steps in the order of DAEBC.
Finally, the correct answer!
Look. Doing A-E is going to be expensive enough for the young fella. I don’t think he can also afford gunshot wound treatment.
In pretty much any “help anyone” kind of procedure or training step 1 is to ensure your own safety.
DAEBC easy peasy
That’s a nice movie script.
House M.D
I like the way you think
F*. Shoot the patient in the head.
*Police version only.
*shoot the victim in the head
FTFY
Thank you, my bad.
*as police, shoot the black person in the head
FTFY
Every medical drill is like this.
“I asses the patient”
"Haha fuckyou they had a katana, you are impaled, and failed to assess basic vitals. They go into respiratory failure. As such you failed america
I don’t like the DM (｡•́︿•̀｡)
“Patient is presenting with chest pain and shortness of breath.”
“Roll for initiative.”
I vote for E
A => D => E
Beat up the rival gang members until they are all laying on the floor in a pile => B.
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E.
“Don’t worry Mr. Patient, I’ll avenge you!”
When Agent 47 is your doctor.
F. See if gang member has insurance to cover for his treatment
G. Charge extra for handling firearm
H. Deferred treatment
I. Pose in front of mirror with it, start work on John Wick inspired medical action drama script in head.
Become overly distracted by it, wondering who would direct, what music to play over scenes, who would play the love interest…
Forget to do basic diligence on another patients’ results. Morbidity and Mortality hearing. Malpractice case.
Try to argue your own defence, but just can’t get the idea of “Love shack” by the B-52’s playing over the scene where you perform CPR on the president on top of the speeding ambulance. Would “Good vibrations” work better, or strike the wrong tone? Does the scene NEED to be at a beach? But then the tidal wave wouldn’t work…
Struck off. Escorted out of hospital, allowed only to get your things from your locker. Security guard standing behind you, unsmiling as you pile notebooks and overly annotated script drafts into a duffle bag.
Suddenly, his radio goes off. Something weird happening at the main entrance, backup needed urgently!! Conflicted, he looks at you with a mix of pity and contempt, before barking an instruction to get your stuff and go as he runs towards the main entrance.
Screams outside, as what looks like a ninja lands on the window outside the locker room, before somersaulting down with an Uzi in each hand. Doves take flight as he does so, in slow motion.
You’ve still got the gun.
It’s happening.
Opening your white coat so it will swoop dramatically, you find “final FINAL final tracklist” on your phone, and hit play, as you pick up the prop nunchucks you brought for script research…
I nominate Niel Patrick Harris for the role of “love interest”
Considering that he got shot in the arm, not the face, my real life response would probably be, “really, man? You didn’t think you should give this to someone else before ems got there?” That’s why I’m not a doctor. Because I’m pretty dumb and bad at hiding my reactions. Also the part with all the blood.
I don’t mind the blood, but the unsaveable dying women and children plus the poop and infected smells is why I never went into medicine. Also my bedside manner is more House than Mr. Rodgers, so I would be sued so fast, like career ending speed run fast.
