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The original was posted on /r/bestofredditorupdates by /u/Direct-Caterpillar77 on 2024-09-17 04:01:11+00:00.
I am not The OOP, OOP is u/throwRAhelp577
Should I sue my girlfriend for selling my stuff
Originally posted to r/relationship_advice
Editor’s Note: OOP uses the term FIR - First Information Report. Slang for police report. This most likely takes place in Singapore
TRIGGER WARNING: Theft
Original Post Oct 20, 2021
We are both in our early twenties and have been together for 3 years. It has been 2 months since we moved in together. When I was a teenager, I was obsessed with collecting pokemon cards; I had over 5000 cards in my collection. A lot of them are very crappy, worth 0.5c to $3, but some are worth up to 250$. Personally, I never intended to sell them or at least not in the near future. My girlfriend gave away my entire collection to her cousin 1 month ago without asking me since he asked her if he could have them when he visited us. She gave them away, believing that since I’m an adult now, I won’t need them. As I was cleaning my room a few hours ago, I realized my collection box was missing and I went crazy looking for it. An hour later she came home after running some errands and told me what she did. I told her to get all of them back, and she has refused because it would be humiliating for her. What should I do? I have a recording of her confessing to it so I can easily get compensated for it in court, but I’m assuming that will effectively end the relationship. Though I love her a lot, I believe I would rather have my cards. It doesn’t seem right to sue her for this, but I don’t know how I can recover my collection. If there is a less aggressive way to handle this, please let me know. Advice?
RELEVANT COMMENTS
OOP
Edit: She gave them all away for 10$
HGTAW
Do you have an estimate or the total value?
OOP
5-5.5k in today’s value
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Yugen903
I’d agree this is a dealbreaker. What an ass. She’s more concerned with her EGO than fixing her mistake! Yes I saw he refused but she did not try hard enough.
HAS SHE EVEN APOLOGIZED?
DiscombobulatedTill
Bet she kept the $10 too.
As for the cousin what an asshole. Obviously it runs in the family.
OP I guess you have to go over and explain the collection wasn’t hers to give or sell. How snotty you have to get depends on what they do about it I guess.
Also most likely you’ll have to give that snotty kid $10.
Edited to say you will probably have to take your gf to small claims court since she doesn’t want to embarrass herself.
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Princessss_xo
Please update with the decision you made.
OOP
Defo contacting the police because apparently, I’m a manchild with ego problems who just wants to humiliate his GF in front of her family members. Like what.
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Vex08
No you shouldn’t sue your girlfriend. It seems like you are ready to break up over this, just insist on getting your cards back. Talk to the cousin/their parents directly if you have to.
That’s a better option than paying thousands of dollars for the court to intervene.
booknerd381
Please upvote this. Court is not cheap and that better be the most impressive hoard of cards ever or you’re never going to get anywhere near the value of the cards just to see a lawyer and have him tell you there’s no way you’ll get this to court.
OOP
They are worth 5-5.5k in terms of today’s value and more importantly, they have sentimental value to me and I’m pretty sure that’s something. One other commentator suggested this is something the police would be able to handle so there is no need for any court so first I will try that and hopefully I get them back.
Thank you for mentioning how expensive that could be so I’ll def keep it as a last resort.
OOP Also added
The small claims court can only award me up to 1000$ (equivalent to my currency) which is not the monetary value of the cards. There is also sentimental value which is worth way more.
My sister is a lawyer and she said since the monetary value is huge, the police will get involved and treat it as a serious matter.
I have given her time to think about it but if she doesn’t do anything I’ll go and file an FIR against her and the cousin since I won’t have any other option at that point.
Update Dec 12, 2021 (2 months later)
Holy shit. Never thought this is how 2021 would end. A lot has happened since my first post. First, thank you for the support, some tips, and good luck.
I’ll start by clearing some assumptions. In my original post I said though “Though I love her a lot, I believe I would rather have my cards”. This statement alone pissed some of you, so let me elaborate on that. My first ever 300 cards were from my father’s collection. He died of hepatitis C. He was quite into gaming. My mum kept his cards for years and gave them to me when I was in my early teens and I got hooked. I grew the collection to 5000 cards. There was immense sentimental value attached to those cards.
After my GF refused to talk to the cousin, he refusing to give me the cards when I asked, his parents being jerks to me, I took the legal route. Filed an FIR. Initially, I had trouble since the police didn’t care about some cards but my sister, who is a lawyer (She is about to become a lawyer) told the police the estimated value and they got interested. We told the police 5 to 5.5k value of the cards. Things took time, but the police eventually confiscated the cards (4987) and got them appraised by a company. They came back with a value of approximately 6000$. I told the police the missing cards were also of substantial value since they were very old (Son of bitch sold the one my father left behind). Cousin told us who he sold to, and those people gave the cards back with no problems. Right now, the police have all the cards. The cousin who I knew had his eyes on my cards threw my GF under the bus. I know this because he wanted to buy those from me in the past, but I refused. He told the police he bought those in good faith. My GF also tried lying to the police, but since I had her on recording, she got into even more trouble.
She got charged with grand larceny and also fined for lying to the police.
I should get the cards by the end of this month or by early January. The police just said they need to finalize and file some reports and then I can have them.
As for proof of all this, I had the cards photos front and back, along with some receipts.
Some of you were also saying that I should take this to small claim court. This amount is too big for that, at least where I am.
EDIT: I forgot to add my sister wants to sue all of them for emotional distress but I don’t about that. Any advice on that?
TLDR; She got arrested; the cousin got some ass whooping in front of me and I have almost got my cards back.
RELEVANT COMMENTS
nickp123456
Probably time to quit referring to her as your girlfriend.
OOP
Shit. I’m so used to it, I didn’t even realize.
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Impressive-Cricket-8
the cousin got some ass whooping in front of me
Do elaborate, please.
OOP
When the police went to confiscate the cards, I and my sister were with them. They got them, left, and we just stood there and his mother slapped the shit out of him. I don’t condone violence, but I won’t say I feel bad for him.
ManzBearzPigzIzRealz
Wait…I thought they were being jerks to you. Why was she upset with him?
OOP
They were jerk with me in the start when the police weren’t involved. I asked them first nicely, they were jerks, I went to the police. So when the police went and confiscated the cards, after that the mum was slapping her kid.
yesgirlsusereddit
Do you think it’s that she didn’t believe her kid could do such a thing and she’s slapping him because it got proven? Or is she slapping him for making the parents have to deal with the law?
OOP
I honestly think it’s because the police came to their house with the…
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Man what’s up with no respecting people’s stuff and pride. Like why?