• 45 Posts
  • 234 Comments
Joined 1 year ago
cake
Cake day: June 7th, 2023

help-circle





  • jjagaimo@lemmy.catome_irl@lemmy.worldme_irl
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    3
    ·
    edit-2
    4 days ago

    I started turning my phone screen off occasionally and then turning it back on while laying in bed. Sometimes it gets me past the not feeling like falling asleep part and I end up knocking right out instead of dragging it out for hours becuase I don’t feel tired. Also prevents me from deciding “I’m going to fall asleep now” and turning off the phone because that never works and I end up more awake than when I was staring at the phone. Same feeling as nodding off to a TV show


  • Not really but kinda. Depends on how you sort the feed. There’s new comments / active / most comments (and maybe scaled?) which factor in number of comments but if you don’t sort by that then number of comments doesn’t affect it in the feed. Also, someone who comments a lot of nonsense is probably going to get blocked, down voted, reported / banned or their posts removed.

    There’s also top hour/the/12hr/day/week/month/year, controversial, new, etc. which won’t factor comments in.






  • You made a stupid post asking “why don’t we do this: if people do X then we should do Y.” People don’t support Y and you then say they must then support people who do X? You are putting words in people’s mouths an they don’t like that. You are also advocating for harm against people who may be innocent or are also human.

    Ever heard of Emmett Till? He a black boy who was accused of whistling at a white woman in 1955 and was lynched, tortured and killed for it. He didn’t do it, and the woman much later admitted she lied about it. Yet nothing has happened to her and his murderers were acquitted



  • I got a cheap pair of the orangest non-prescription glasses I could find that weren’t straight sunglasses and it took me from crushing headaches when I get home from work to mild discomfort by the end of the day. The only problem is they can make color perception a bit difficult (greens/blues, yellows/whites), but it’s workable for the most part. My eyes adjusted and I can still tell apart most things and anything that I can’t, I can take a quick glance w/o them. One thing to keep in mind though: they reflect blue light so you might want ones with blinders / wear normal sunglasses if you’re outside, since having the sun behind you can reflect it right into your eyes. They look a bit goofy but I’d take looking goofy over physical pain

    There are also orange clip ons that can go on existing glasses. If they have this kind of coating for prescription lenses though, I’d definitely get them

    Also cuts blinding blue headlights from incoming traffic



  • It’s funny that you assumed that “enough people told me that” from one instance that this reminded me of. I didn’t victim blame them for experiencing sexism. I said that accusing innocent people who they’ve never interacted with and generalizing statements is ridiculous. Maybe be more specific on how my comment was “problematic” instead of some vague doublespeak.


  • None of the situations I was talking about involved direct replies to women talking about their own experiences. Everything I’ve seen has essentially been “I’d choose the bear and you should feel ashamed.” If there are people making those kinds of comments in reply to women speaking about their experience and how they feel, I would agree with you that it is not acceptable. But 90% of what I see is blanket accusations or false dilemmas placing some viewpoint on me that I do not hold.

    And in a way it does resemble “all lives matter.” But when there are people here directly saying that all men should be ashamed, that they are not safe to be around, and I have seen people saying in these threads that all men are rapists, it seems a little hard to see how that would make anyone understand or sympathize with the people making these comments. It starts to sound like “my feelings should take precedence over your existence” instead of “this is what I feel and why” or “this is how we can improve things.”

    Its also ridiculous to me when it’s “but a man could rape me” but no “a bear could maul me.” If someone says that they have been SA’d or have otherwise had negative experiences, fine. I still think its a bit of a stretch to generalize it but I’m not out there saying “BuT nOt AlL mEn” to that.


  • People “don’t want to listen” because the moment anyone speaks out against the generalizations, it becomes personal attacks against them. “you are part of the problem if you don’t immediately agree with everything I say.” That’s not to say that someone is not valid for the way they feel after experiencing something traumatic like SA and having hesitation associating with or being around men, but the accusations of being the problem towards people who are innocent make people not want to support you. It’s also very “only my feelings matter” when it starts sounding like I shouldn’t be anywhere in the remote vicinity of or exist because I might be making a woman uncomfortable.

    Once when I was in high school I was in the classroom alone waiting for class to start, minding my own business and not paying any attention to anyone else. A girl walked in and told me that I looked like I wanted to kill her. I didn’t even look in her direction. How dare I be quiet and mind my own business, I made her feel uncomfortable.

    It’s also funny that people are saying “y’all always have to make it about you, it’s not about you so what you think doesn’t matter.” Yeah how dare I have feelings and be offended that other people make generalizations about me and start saying I’m part of the problem.