I mean this in the nicest possible way, but I think you need to talk to someone and try and gain a new perspective. People aren’t inherently mean, and generally aren’t thinking about much other than themselves. People do “chill” as they get older and realize a lot of things really don’t matter in the long run.
Go find a team sport or a hobby with other like-minded people and focus on building a community of friendship and support. Your life is too short to not spend it being happy.
There’s a big difference here in “can’t” and “won’t”. Are you so sure you “can’t” accept support because you “can’t” have a different perspective, or have you really made an effort to change the only part of this equation you truly have control over, yourself. I don’t know you, but reading your replies really makes me feel that you have simply made up your mind in such a way that you “won’t” accept help or support. This will only lead you to the same unhappy outcomes you’ve apparently been experiencing in your life.
One thing you’ll find as you get older is that it’s actually never too late to make meaningful changes in your life and if you realize this and actively work to build your social community outside of the Internet, then you’re actually starting from a much better place than most people in this world. Move somewhere new, change your routine, focus on yourself physically and mentally to be the best person you can be. You are the apex of human evolution, all you have to do is find the things that you’re good at and the things that give you joy and enjoy what little time we have on this earth.
I truly hope you find happiness one day