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Alright, buckle up, test subjects! This is Cave Johnson, the man who’s not afraid to tackle the tough topics, like Pride Month and… Mantis Men. That’s right, you heard me correctly.
Here at Aperture Science, we’re all about inclusivity, whether you’re human, robot, or even a Mantis Man. So, in addition to celebrating Pride Month for our LGBTQ+ community, we’re also extending a warm, robotic arm to our Mantis Men friends out there.
To all our Mantis Men employees and test subjects, I want you to know that Aperture Science sees you, we appreciate you, and we’re here for you. Whether you’re scuttling through test chambers or just trying to find a quiet spot to molt, we support you in all your mantis-y glory.
So, let’s raise a toast to diversity, to acceptance, and to the Mantis Men among us. Because here at Aperture Science, we believe that love knows no bounds, not even when it comes to interdimensional insectoid beings. Now, get your lazy butts back to science! because who knows what kind of groundbreaking discoveries we’ll make next, whether it involves portals, shower curtains or potato batteries! I’m not paying you for Mantis Men dance parties!
This is Cave Johnson, we’re done here
i really don’t get how it even helps their bottom line. like did IBM calculate supporting pride might attract a larger number of queer people and radlibs into buying their laptop than the number of bigots who’d genuinely avoid them for it? honestly doubt that with all the rabid chuds out there. are they hoping for some hate comments/people arguing under their posts in a “any publicity is good publicity” kinda way (boost themselves in the algorithm)?
It might be like those defence contractor adverts - there’s a couple of actual individual people that they want to appeal to, either socially or politically, so they make some mild public gestures to show that they’re also cool. The public are irrelevant.
Or yeah, the vast egregore spirit of the company just thinks “This behaviour set appears to be popular, but is contested, therefore invest minimally in aesthetic appeasement”.
corporate progressive posturing exists to trick the public into thinking there is progress in social issues and that the capitalist system and corporations are working together to fix them. the cost of turning their logo into a rainbow for a month is also completely negligible for IBM or any comparable company. it’s just propaganda (that the people at the company might also believe themselves)
*vwoomp*
'Vital testes apparatus destroyed"
