• frog 🐸@beehaw.org
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    24 days ago

    Unsatisfied with merely winning the election in the UK, Starmer went mad with power, and under his command Labour drove the Tories out of the UK. Terrified former Conservative MPs fled before them, retreating towards Russia, who had always reliably helped them before, but they discovered to their horror that Russia was now backing Reform, and they soon found themselves trapped between two advancing armies.

    The Lib Dems were just on holiday in Switzerland, hoping to get some good photos of Ed Davey skiing so that people would notice them. Rumour has it they did notice a couple of Tory MPs running past, but decided not to help, because they weren’t falling for that a second time.

    The EU said “look, can you guys go and do this somewhere else?”

    However, Starmer’s bloodlust could not be sated, and the slaughter continued…