(Content warning, discussions of SA and misogyny, mods I might mention politics a bit but I hope this can be taken outside the context of politics and understood as a discussion of basic human decency)

We all know how awful Reddit was when a user mentioned their gender. Immediate harassment, DMs, etc. It’s probably improved over the years? But still awful.

Until recently, Lemmy was the most progressive and supportive of basic human dignity of communities I had ever followed. I have always known this was a majority male platform, but I have been relatively pleased to see that positive expressions of masculinity have won out.

All of that changed with the recent “bear vs man” debacle. I saw women get shouted down just for expressing their stories of being sexually abused, repeatedly harassed, dogpiled, and brigaded with downvotes. Some of them held their ground, for which I am proud of them, but others I saw driven to delete their entire accounts, presumably not to return.

And I get it. The bear thing is controversial; we can all agree on this. But that should never have resulted in this level of toxicity!

I am hoping by making this post I can kind of bring awareness to this weakness, so that we can learn and grow as a community. We need to hold one another accountable for this, or the gender gap on this site is just going to get worse.

    • JonsJava@lemmy.worldM
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      19 days ago

      Please explain your comment. It could be seen that you are (mockingly or otherwise) stating that all sex is rape. As this is not completely clear, I would ask that you explain what you meant.

        • JonsJava@lemmy.worldM
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          19 days ago

          Following that logic:

          • we shouldn’t try to stop murder, because it will always happen
          • we shouldn’t try to stop racism, because it will always happen
          • we shouldn’t try to stop slavery, because it will always happen
          • we shouldn’t try to stop government corruption, because it will always happen

          We shouldn’t look at our past and say “we will never rise up above this, so why try”. We become better incrementally, by TRYING to be better.

          By basically saying “you’re disillusion for advocating for better” means you’ve given up. I and many like me haven’t. There’s no reason we can’t work towards a safer society for all.

          • Sizzler@slrpnk.net
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            19 days ago

            I mean you can try but those things will always exist. That’s all my point is. You can educate and in this case berate but that’s human nature for you.